Mixture Of Goodness And Badness For Birthday Month

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Category: General Blogs   Author: Noel   Posted: 2 months ago
URL: http://noelsnaughtynook.com/blog/mixture-of-goodness-and-badness-for-birthday-month


Exactly as the title says.

My birthday is at the end of the month... but I generally celebrate my birthday the ENTIRE MONTH because it just makes life more fun that way. Anyway we've started celebrating and partying, my group of friends and I, however its REAAAALLY had its ups and downs so far. So two nights ago we decide.. Uh. Duh. TITTY BARS! Let's do it. We pick up on of our male friends from a bar, let's call him Bob, who was already quite drunk. I have one of my female friends with me (who happens to be my assistant for Pixel Vixens. I talk about her occasionally, I think), and two other male friends. Yes, I hang out with MANY A DUDES. Some of you don't believe me when I say that. But I do. Im generally with dudes all the time plus my like, three close female friends (and I rarely see two of them)

So anyway, we have to drive 45 minutes to the club... Which is fine and dandy. But bob is wasted. Which entailed lots of bad-singing and dancing to the radio while we went. Which mind you - was fun. We danced and sang and were stupid while driving the way to the club.

Start in on our first club: And mind you, my heart drops when I see it (it had been a titty bar I hadnt been to yet in the area.. I was like "THOSE EXIST?!" Since I thought I'd seen them all by half a year into being 18) But yeah.. My heart drops. Why, you ask? Because this bar is inside a HOUSE. like, they took a house-building... and made it into a dinky, suspicious looking titty bar. GENERALLY i'm all about showing off my titties with the stripper-girls and having a gay ol' time... But this one I kinda just sipped on my beer and sat quietly while strangers put dollars in front of me. I know I know, strangers putting dollars in front of girls is normal... But you need to understand... THESE PEOPLE LOOKED FUCKING SUSPICIOUS. To the point the bar had to KEEP THE GIRLS BATHROOM LOCKED AT ALL TIMES. FINALY I made a friend with one of the stripper, I bought a "private dance" from her which honestly entailed us sitting in the back laughing our butts off over everything while men tried to peek in at us. I had her on the floor laughing at once point. VERY fun.

Anyway, the creeps at the bar were getting to much for me, especially after I found out some random man had gropped the ass of my female friend, so I was like "FUCK THIS, WE OUT." and we decided to go to the biggest titty bar in our area (which is also a HUUUGE PARTY BAR)

Anyway, we get there, and the place is PACKED. like.. NO CHAIRS AT ALL. We were standing looking for chairs for a good 15 minutes and finally found a table for our beer and three seats for us to take turns sitting at. Which I guess meant, the girls sit at permanently while the boys take tturns putting dollars in front of us and trying to see our tits (LAWL. silly boys. you can see my titties online too, ya know) But anyway... THEN the fun started. My girlfriend and I drank more freely now, the strippers were really fun and interactive... half the time we were topless and goofing off with the strippers (there was ONE point were a bachelor party was legit just THROWING DOLLARS at a stripper to stay over with us and keep our shirts off. Haha. Loved it. Girls in the audience willing to take clothes off = a GOOOD night for the dancing ladies) So yeah. Uber freaking fun. The night continues, we're there a few hours... and theeen Bob has to interject (now you'll see why he got a name and no one else did) So, I'll admit, there was a crowd of men around my girl and I. But there's a few big rules about me... Ya don't touch me, ya don't make crude remarks to me, and ya don't treat me like a prostitute... You don't do those things, I'll be fine with you. I mean we're at a fucking stripclub, I'm not gonna be some tightwad asshole being all "NOOO DONT LOOK AT MEEE" ... uh. no. My tits are out for a reason... Because I'm being an attention whore and getting free dollars for more boobies in my face. So anyway, a group of men are around, Im actually mid conversation with one about my hair (it GLOOOOWED in the dark like, per usual) and all was fun and good. But then Bob comes blundering over and litterally THREATENS all the guys around us, saying if they didn't leave he'd kick all their asses. Queue angry me. So the guys disperse. Which honestly means, my fun dispersed. I liked talking to a lot of those guys. They were nice and respectable. Yes, I'm SURE a majority of them had ulterior motives... But none of them were acting on it, and if they'd asked me or my friend to come home with them, they'd have gotten an immediate no. And if they got bitchy THEN, well all we would have had to do is wave our arms and our guy friends could THEN take care of it. Anyway, so my other guy friends, who understand that, ya know, I know my shit, Im naked for a living, if I were honestly uncomfortable I'd tell them (I mean they're sitting at a table.. DIRECTLY BEHIND ME. It wouldnt be that hard) But then here's Bob.. threatening everyone and pissing me and my girl off. So we're both all "what... in the fuck." And he starts getting all "I WANNA GET IN A FIGHT. I WANNA FIGHT." And I wave the boys over, tell them, they drag him away so my girl and I can have a little more fun. Ohhh no. We get about 15 minutes, another gentleman comes and stands beside us and starts giving us dollars and talking to us, we're having fun... But then Bob shows up again and is an all around douche about shit. The guy is being a real good sport about it, and once Bob walks away he laughs at us and says "Soooo who wants to bet the next round of dollars that he's trying to sleep with one of you?" We laughed. Because honestly, we knew that was the truth (he'd told my room mate/best friend who is one of the guys with us that he was trying to get in my girlfriends pants at the earlier bar. so we've just been kinda smiling and nodding at him, trying to not give him too many ideas) So anyway, the guy keeps talking to us, and we enjoy his company. More strippers come up, we're getting the girls tips, it's all wonderful. THEN BOB COMES BACK -AGAIN- "I Wanna fight someone. I wanna fight someone." Okay. fuck this. Im no longer having fun due to him being a prick. we're leaving. My girl and I go to the bathroom and our group heads toward the door. The boys start telling us "did you see the crude remarks that guy was making about you guys to his friend up on the other side of the stage?" We say no. "He was making humping motions and pussy licking motions... it was disgusting." "we didn't see this." "OF COURSE YOU DIDNT" bob is being all obnoxious and 'I-need-to-protect-the-little-ones'... Its annoying. So I'm like. "Look. I don't give a SHIT if he was showing off to his buddies. We're at a damn STRIP club, she and I are obviously drunk, yes, but we aren't MORONS. we're not gonna stick our tongue down some strangers throat. And ya know what? I don't blame him for showing off... not only are we at a strip club, but we're both TAKING OFF OUR SHIRTS FOR FUN. Sooo yeah. Had I been a dude and that was happenign by me, I'd be showing off too." Bob gets all grumbly. My room mate is all "Can we just go home now? Bob is getting... yyyeah" And Im like yes. Lets go home. Queue uncomfortable car ride home full of Bob hitting on friend while drunkenly ELBOWING me over and over in the side. Now mind you, Bob is a big boy. Not like, fat big, I mean like, he works out every single day big. He's not a muscle head... but the boy has got a body. So 45 minutes of him elbowing me over and over again (and me occasionally getting bitchy and saying "FUCKING STOP" and he'll stop for a bit just to do it again) And FINALLY we drop Bob off. ... My side is killing me. I'm at the brink of tears because it hurts to breath. It almost feels like my rib was broken again. So my friends are like "are you okay? are you okay?" and just wanting the night to be over without drama Im like yes, yes Im fine. Finally we get to our other guy friends place as we're all staying the night there, and I just bawl. Walking hurts, breathing hurts, bending hurts. Im worried my rib is re-broken. And the part that scares me the most is the fact that I'm drunk and I'm STILL in lots of pain. Im wondering HOW MUCH MORE pain I'd be in if sober. my room mate is being the usual big brother figure to me, and since he went to med school for a while but dropped when we moved away together he never finished his degree... However it DOES make him my personal doctor (NOT LIKE THAT, PERVERTS) So anyway, he checks me out, and he says that it looks like I was just beaten raw from him elbowing me, but my rib is fine. He checks me over for a few other things, has me drink two cups of water, and sends me off to bed.

Next day, the girlfriend and I are like "Last night was bullshit." So we decide.. Let's go back to the strip club, only let's go with only girls this time. My girlfriend knows WAAAAY more girls than I do, so she invites some of them to come with us.

We go back to the big party bar, and once again ANOTHER BACHELOR PARTY is there. We take our seats and start putting out dollars. Were there about an hour before strippers start stealing our clothes. But then, to my dismay, we start getting drunk jerks. Ya know how I mentioned my rules above? Besides the touching part (I would have tased a fucker if they touched me...) they broke them all. Despite gettig married soon, the Bachelor was trying to get us to go to his party, go home with him, go to a back room to suck him off, saying all this nasty ass shit to us. And we're like "....really? You guys are making it so we DONT want to take our clothes off." and they were rude to the strippers too. They kept trying to lick their pussies while dancing, and stick dollar bills up inside them, they'd open their mouths and try looking the titties when getting boobs in their face... It took a LOT of will power to NOT punch these douche bags in the face. However, besides the douche bags, I had fun. A line of girls at the stage with dollars in front of them is the best scene I think I'll ever be able to see at a strip club. So I enjoyed myself.

SO let's see... BEFORE the second trip to the titty club, during the day, I got to help out with my Haunt group. October is soon, so we're finishing everything off... It's gonna be goooooooooood :D Not going into much detail of it though.

HOWEVER i WILL go into detail the amount of BUG BITES i got while I got there. I was covered head to toe with clothes, except for my feet sine I wore sandals. I get home, and realize my feet are seriously COVERED in bug bites. I look like a lepper. For real. It's so HORRIBLE since there are so many bites in one small area and I cant scratch since I scar easy when it comes to bites. URG. So I've been dealing with that too. ITCHY ITCHY ITCHY

So yeah.. Birthmonth has had its ups and downs so far..and it's only the third day!! GAAAH

Btw, like last year Im making a birthday thank you package for anyone who gets me something for my birthday :) However much the gift costed you will be however many parts of the thank you package you get (Which will be a birthday themed photo set, video set, a digital signed print from me, ect) http://amzn.com/w/2K8EG0AOWSA96

Annnnd yeah. that's it for this long-ass blog!!!


 

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James   2 months ago

Happy Birth Month


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